she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
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