Texts From Last Night

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  (912): View more from Georgia

  i woke up with socks on this morning

  (485): View more from

  so?

  (912): View more from Georgia

  i didnt wear socks last night

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  (912): i woke up with socks on this morning (485): so? (912): i didnt wear socks last night http://tfl.nu/lw6k
  Replies (5) Good night (1601) Bad night (533)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  What did we do last night that was yellow?

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  (860): What did we do last night that was yellow? http://tfl.nu/a1qq
  Replies (4) Good night (1172) Bad night (1993)
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  (914): View more from New York

  fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.

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  (914): fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no. http://tfl.nu/w88c
  Replies (17) Good night (1155) Bad night (5812)
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  (914): View more from New York

  you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.

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  (914): you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap. http://tfl.nu/d86b
  Replies (10) Good night (1542) Bad night (3371)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.

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  (410): I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him. http://tfl.nu/mi5e
  Replies (5) Good night (611) Bad night (1928)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard

  (1-417): View more from Missouri

  Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.

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  (417): I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard (1-417): Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming. http://tfl.nu/52u7
  Replies (2) Good night (1172) Bad night (1476)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest

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  (250): I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest http://tfl.nu/zut9
  Replies (18) Good night (1296) Bad night (490)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.

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  (970): I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed. http://tfl.nu/hmgx
  Replies (10) Good night (591) Bad night (1550)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..

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  (201): The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in.. http://tfl.nu/ctm0
  Replies (5) Good night (1284) Bad night (592)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.

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  (720): Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description. http://tfl.nu/i5hv
  Replies (3) Good night (2314) Bad night (588)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.

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  (304): Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it. http://tfl.nu/runs
  Replies (3) Good night (755) Bad night (316)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?

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  (613): I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas? http://tfl.nu/j6a7
  Replies (1) Good night (496) Bad night (315)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me

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  (303): So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me http://tfl.nu/rws0
  Replies (4) Good night (585) Bad night (372)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.

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  (573): He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it. http://tfl.nu/rclz
  Replies (3) Good night (276) Bad night (712)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.

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  (727): I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now. http://tfl.nu/q4wq
  Replies (0) Good night (717) Bad night (194)

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