It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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