Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
