Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
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