I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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