haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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