..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously