I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
