I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I need to stop coming to work sober
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
