Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize