This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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