Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
