last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
