I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
