Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
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