Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
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The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
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This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
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