If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
