I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
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