I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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