Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Randomize