There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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