would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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