operation have a gay friend backfired
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
We don't watch enough power rangers
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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