So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Randomize
