dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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