is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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