come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
