she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
