I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
