I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
