I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
