i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
