This girl is more easily done than said...
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
should my penis look like a turkey
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
