dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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