if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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