Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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