Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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