but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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