my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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