Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
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