never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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