Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
