did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Randomize