No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
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