is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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