every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
