Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
