Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
we're making bets on your personal life
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
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