You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize